Reviewed by Erica Carr

As the title suggests, this is a diary of the author's struggle with anorexia. She begins with the genesis of her illness in childhood, and her accompanying diagnosis of OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder). As she moves on to her college years, we see her falling deeper into her eating disorder and the subsequent behaviours. I felt anger emanating from her narrative, mostly towards the eating disorder, and the frustration of it continually pulling her back. There is also criticism of her treatment, although she does take some personal responsibility for its failings in success. Personally, I found this a difficult book to read, not from the standpoint of the writing, but from the "stuff" it evoked in me - memories of past behaviours and situations, there was so much I could relate to, and I even found myself tempted to fall back. Not that she glamourizes her situation, but I guess I'm still very vulnerable at this time in my "recovery." It's a good book for those living or working with a person with an eating disorder - the author is adept at putting her thoughts and feelings into words - and it may be helpful for someone who is "falling into" the disorder or is newly diagnosed - there's a sense of not being alone. However, as someone who is reaching for recovery, the author isn't quite as inspiring as I would like, and this is probably my own need for greater optimism. Although she does offer hope, I did not find it quite as convincing as I would have liked.